Personal Writing: A Respect to Decision Makers

People made decisions everyday. Some did it good. Some didn't. Some went through so many things to get into the final decision. Some just had the idea popped up on their minds during shower. I am not different either. 

The first ever decision that I made on my own was when I had to choose the major in University. Ever since I was in elementary school I just went with the flow of my surroundings. Like when most of my friends chose to continue their studies at 'A' Middle High, I did too. Same things happened when I chose Senior High School. I just never really had my own preferences back then. I simply thought that what most people chooses is what best for me as well.

So, during my final year of high school when we had to make our decision to choose what major we'd be learning, I chose to be different. When most of my friends were fighting for medical science, I chose this one Engineering Department for good. And as much as confident I were when choosing this, I had my ups and downs that sometimes led me up to the boredom and even regret.

There were days when I felt so blessed that I chose this faculty because of so many good things and exciting experiences happened to me. I did regret once, but it was not to the extent I wanted to restart everything all over again. I just wondered what if I chose another faculty and so on. But I never really wanted to leave what I started. I am not that kind of person. Well, boredom might come once or twice. It is natural since we're all human who has limit to everything. We just need to take a deeper breath, get over it, and continue where we had paused. 

Back to making decision, it is never an easy thing to deal with. Like I said, some people might went through so many things just to make sure they chose the right flower to brighten their loved ones. To make such simple decision, they gave it all their best. I appreciate that kind of people a lot. For me, they seem taking things seriously, not just seeing it as some random things they're dealing with.

I, myself, always make a decision in a serious way. I considered so many things before coming to the final choice. Sometimes people might see me as a person who didn't make her decision seriously. People can judge, but they would never know what made me choosing this path I am walking on. They might think I carelessly made my way but I know what I do, and I know I have God with me in every decisions that I made. I respect people's opinion because I believe every human being has their own preferences and says. But I respect myself more and I respect the opinion from the people I love. I make my decision based on what my heart and soul feel right, based on what people I love say what fits me better, upon my continuous prays and hopes to God. Those three things, I believe will always lead me into making the best decision for my life.

The reasonings behind every decisions are going in a various way and as mysterious as one's heart, I don't think we have the rights to judge whether it's good or bad. We will never know what made them choose their way unless we ever been in their shoes and see from the same spectacles. Well, who knows that the decisions they made may not be the ones they want as well but under some circumstances, they have to choose that way. So, isn't it better to let people has control on their own lifes as long as they don't cross the boundaries as well? Just, you know, as the respect to every decision makers out there.

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Dukung Perbaikan Pendidikan Indonesia Lewat Bisnis Indonesia Writing Contest 2014!

Pagi dunia!
Sudah cukup lama tidak posting dalam bahasa (baca: bahasa Indonesia), jadi agak bingung mau menulis dalam bahasa baku atau tidak, ha ha.
Sejumlah postingan saya terakhir tertulis dalam bahasa Inggris. Sebenarnya bukan karena tidak suka menulis dalam bahasa, Tetapi hanya ingin sekedar melancarkan kemampuan menulis dalam bahasa asing. Jadi maklum saja kalau postingan-postingan tersebut kelihatan 'amatiran' dan grammar-nya kurang sempurna. Paling tidak, saya sudah mencoba.
Kali ini, saya tidak menge-post tulisan-seperti yang biasa saya tulis. Saya sedang mengikuti kontes menulis di Bisnis.com. Ada beberapa tema yang diangkat dan kebetulan saya memilih tema 'Membangun Pendidikan'. Bukan tanpa alasan, saya memilih tema ini karena didorong oleh keprihatinan terhadap dunia Pendidikan Indonesia yang masih perlu (banyak) perbaikan. Artikel saya dalam kontes ini membahas tentang kondisi dunia pendidikan Indonesia yang memiliki dua sisi berbeda. Bumi dan langit, istilah yang saya gunakan. Saya berangkat dari membandingkan dua sisi tersebut lalu menganalisis penyebab perbedaannya dan mencoba memberikan solusi atas fenomena tersebut dari kaca mata pandang saya, seorang amatiran di dunia pendidikan (maklum, titel saya juga masih satu). Mungkin solusi yang saya beri belum tentu merupakan solusi yang tepat, tetapi artikel ini saya tulis dengan tujuan sebagai bahan renungan kita semua atas pendidikan di Indonesia yang tidak hanya masih memerlukan banyak perbaikan, tetapi juga memerlukan perbaikan yang tepat. Akan sangat bagus sekali apabila teman-teman memberikan komentar di akhir artikel saya pada link berikut Bumi dan Langit Pendidikan Indonesia sehingga kita bisa mendiskusikan gagasan-gagasan yang lebih tepat lagi untuk kemajuan pendidikan di Indonesia.
Apabila artikel saya berkenan di hati teman-teman pembaca atau mungkin teman-teman sejalan dengan pemikiran saya, mohon bantuannya untuk mem-vote artikel saya tersebut. Voting bisa dilakukan di akhir artikel dengan meng-input karakter captcha dan meng-klik tombol submit vote. Jika berkenan, teman-teman dapat juga menge-share artikel ini melalui account jejaring sosial seperti facebook, twitter, linked in, ataupun google+ melalui tombol ikon di samping artikel untuk mengajak lebih banyak orang untuk turut membaca renungan ini dan menyumbangkan gagasannya.
Mungkin menulis artikel tentang pendidikan dan saling membagi inspirasi seperti yang saya dan teman-teman lakukan ini amatlah sederhana. Tetapi dengan kesadaran untuk melakukan hal-hal kecil dan sederhana inilah, kita sudah dapat memupuknya untuk berbuat hal berguna yang lebih besar lagi untuk kemajuan pendidikan Indonesia ke arah yang lebih baik.
Setiap orang punya keterbatasan masing-masing. Pada saat ini, saya belum mampu untuk mewujudkan dukungan saya terhadap perbaikan pendidikan di Indonesia dalam kancah yang lebih luas seperti turut urun rembug dalam menyusun sistem pendidikan bersama dengan pihak pemerintah. Tetapi at least, saya mencoba untuk mendukung dengan cara lebih sederhana, menuliskan artikel renungan dan (Insya Allah) inspiratif ini untuk membantu memberikan gambaran mengenai fenomena-fenomena di dunia pendidikan Indonesia dan membangkitkan kesadaran dini bagi masyarakat luas untuk turut menyumbangkan gagasannya bagi pendidikan Indonesia yang lebih baik.
Last, every big thing starts with a simple one. Ayo dukung perbaikan Pendidikan Indonesia dimulai dari hal kecil!
Click, vote, dan share link berikut Bumi dan Langit Pendidikan Indonesia 
^^

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Personal Writing: Me Today: Realization

Dejected feeling I feel all the time

I enter a whole new part of my life. I am no longer those girl with reports on my hand running here and there yelling 'deadline-deadline' crazily. I don't chase the campus bus anymore because run out of time. I don't stress, stay up late at night in front of computer, sleep secretly during class, or skip lunch because all the stupid waitings. It is no longer part of my life now. But I miss those already. It seems like it was just yesterday I entered the campus life. Now I already leave them all behind. I am not a student anymore, I got heavier responsibility now. Those two letters submitted in the end of my name look so beautiful yet, idk, strangely weighted? Sometimes I feel kind of proud, most of the time I feel annoyed. Those two letters prevent me from acting silly (which is real me), it makes people avert their looks at me like, 'dude you're not a kid, cut the act!'
That annoyed me sometimes but I know it's time. It's that time of moment when people migrates to the next step of their life. It's my turn now. At first I was so excited that I couldn't stop making future plans of my life. Different versions each day cause it is just too much I wanna grab at once. But apparently I was not ready. I don't know why. It was just, I think I'm not mentally prepared. I can't help feeling anxious all the time. I kind of become so sensitive upon my surrounding. One time I really want to have a decent job and build my carreer path. The next day I gave up because I think I messed up my job interview. Minutes later I want to continue my study and pursue master degree. But next thing I did was just sitting on the edge my bed, wondering if it is my true passion then burying my face on the pillow drowsily, ready to sleep any moment. I seem like can not find my right path, what I wanna do in my life. Is it normal?

The lazier I get, the worse this stupid worries attack me. I don't like this. But yet, I have no idea how to fix this. What a confusing human being, I am..
At this rate, I just missed my friends so much. My childhood friends, middle school friends, high school friends, even current friends.. all my friends. I will start logging in my social network account that has been left for some good times in order to know how they've been. I want to chat them, I want to have a long talk about our long forgotten memories, I want to at least say hello to them.
But apparently it was not my day. Instead of being able to exchange hellos, it turned to be my crybooster (if this word even exists...).
Why?
They all have changed. Not in a bad way, I said. But they,.. idk, they found their path of life already? Some had been working for some times, others are working on their master's degree life, some even got married! It is not that I want to follow the latter ones, fyi, but what does matter... they ALL seemed to know what will they do with their only once life. Then again something crawls in, dejected feeling. And I didn't know I can be more depressed than ever.
My true passion, where should I find them?
I have so many things in mind right now though I am not sure whether it is really really my true passion. But I think I know where the problem lies here.
The problem lies on my so called heart.
Yes, it is true. I think to have so many things I want to do in the future is normal. It is called.. excited? Well, passionate maybe? It is good, isn't it? Now the problem is, what I've been calling.. not mentally prepared yet. Until when will you stay in this state? The moment I took my very first step into university, I should've been prepared. Because that was when you choose what you're gonna be later. When you took your first step to Engineering-related major, it most probably you chose to be an Engineer or at least to be someone who has a tough job, physically-mentally. You should've known that. That not-mentally-prepared, it sounds mostly like an excuse.
A lame excuse to cover dark side of you who is not dare to take a risk.
There, I said it.
Sooner or later those dark side will cover all your heart and mind and you will end up being a complete loser. I always be that one person who is left behind cause I am too scared of taking risks. It doesn't sound like fun.
Then go change. Change yourself!
People changed, then why can't you change?
Go erase that worries and scares buddy. It is not too late to do so. The late is never exist for the change. Of course you can't change what in the past, all the stupid doings you did on the past. No need to regret it too.
Things won't change once you regret it, right?
Who cares what stupid things you did on the past. People tends to forget their past faster, especially the bad ones (though people also tends to remember the others's bad past but that's different case, if you know what I mean). So, all you have to do now is to shush away that lame mental. It is hard, but you know, as time flies, what was once hard will turn into the easy one. It is natural.

Well, guess what people. I wrote this at first because I thought it would help to ease my uneasy deeds inside a bit. You know, sharing the bitterness. But as the words flow away, I guess I hit the realization button. Wow, what magic did writing do to me. I guess I should write more then~

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Personal Writing: Lessons Learned from We Got Married

Lately I’m busy in downloading some episodes of a South Korean variety show: We Got Married.
Well its kinda show where two people, a man and a woman be a couple and live several months together as “married” couple. Every week they’ll get missions to be completed and through this they’ll get closer each other. I love this show totally because, well, theyre sometimes being such a fool and cute and shy when they have to do everything together like a married couple. There are some lessons too that people can get by watching this variety show. It is like how to praise or treat each other as a couple.
Seeing them on this variety show makes me thinking that being a couple (not yet a married one) is really difficult. It’s not like, you just need to act good to them or such, it’s more than that. It’s about how to decrease your ego facing problem that come between you two, because it’s like a two handed-glass, you need the others’ hand to hold the glass while you hold the other side.
By now, I love my thought about it’s better if people doing this variety show before they become a real couple. Because there are so many things that have to be learned. And sometimes learning is become easier if you use the fake situation, isn’t it?

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Personal Writing: INDEPENDENCE DAY OF INDONESIA

August, 17th

Today is the independence day of the country where I’ve been stayed since 18 yrs ago. Indonesia. An archipelago country in South East Asia. Indonesia has so many natural resources but yeah, not the human resources. Well, we’re famous with that statement. But it’s been 66 yrs, don’t we want to change the statement? Don’t we tired of listening to it? Don’t we?
Well, not easy to invite all the people here to change. Back up to the 66 yrs ago! Take a breath is even very difficult before the August 17, 1945. We had no choice except involving ourselves in mass torture committed by the invaders. Look now, even it’s us who take over what invaders did, colonizing nations themselves.
I’m not in the middle of a independence day speech like what Mr President always do every yrs. I am just, well, trying to give my opinion on my own beloved country. I love Indonesia and I want it to change. Been 66 yrs ago and it’s still few of the things improved. The moral? I don’t have to say anything, you’ve seen.
Today, I pray to Allah. May Indonesia always stands still, keep growing, improving, and realizing that we are very rich in nature so we have to do a little more big step to give a change to this beautiful country. I know You love this country, You just want us to change ourselves 1st before You ‘change’ it.
So today, with all the love inside my heart, I say Happy Independence Day to you, Indonesia. I believe we can!

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