June 24, 2011

Personal Writing: Cosmological Coincidence

See the title above? Well, if you read Raditya Dika’s MMJ you’ll know what it means.
Cosmological coincidence atau kebetulan kosmos adalah kebetulan yang dirancang oleh alam semesta. Bagaimana akhirnya dua orang bisa bertemu dan menciptakan sejarah baru adalah suatu kebetulan yang ga akan pernah kita tahu bagaimana awal mulanya. Pada awalnya sih aku ga pernah benar-benar menyadari bahwa semua pertemuan itu bisa jadi adalah kebetulan kosmos. Sampai several days ago, pengalaman memperjelas definisi ini.
Kebetulan itu terjadi dengan sangat aneh. Mungkin saja suatu hari kamu sedang duduk di sebuah coffee shop saat tiba-tiba seseorang tanpa sengaja menjatuhkan dompetnya karena banyaknya barang yang dibawanya, dan kemudian di lain kesempatan kamu duduk di coffee shop yang sama bersama orang tersebut seraya tertawa dan berkata, “ ..aku masih ingat dompet biru kamu jatuh di sebelah sana..”
Atau mungkin kamu memang sudah lama mengharapkan seseorang tersebut bakal say hi ke kamu lalu yang terjadi di hari berikutnya adalah kalian ada di satu meja yang sama dan having lunch together.
Semua itu pernah terjadi pada kita dan bahkan tanpa kita sadari, ‘kebetulan’ itulah yang akhirnya mempertemukan kita pada apa yang kita sebut destiny. Takdir. Cinta.
Kenyataannya, Dika benar. Pertemuan dua orang yang akhirnya jatuh cinta memang hal yang paling menarik untuk diceritakan. Bagaimana segalanya yang konyol waktu itu bisa jadi sesuatu yang membuat kita menangis tak henti beberapa tahun kemudian. Kita ga akan pernah tau siapa saja yang akan kita temui keesokan harinya. Mungkin siapa yang kita temui besok ternyata adalah orang yang nantinya akan menjalani hari tua bersama kita di teras rumah dengan dua cangkir teh bertulis papa dan mama. Kita ga akan pernah tau semua itu, kita ga akan pernah tau apakah orang yang bersama kita sekarang adalah orang yang “diizinkan” untuk mencintai kita. 
Pada akhirnya, kita berharap cosmological coincidence bakal mempertemukan kita dengan orang yang tepat. Namun pada dasarnya kamu ga bisa hanya sekedar berharap karena sebetulnya ‘kebetulan’ itu juga ga akan selalu bekerja kalau tidak ada efforts. Maksudnya, kalau kamu memang berharap cosmological coincidence akan terjadi di antara kamu dan orang yang kamu inginkan, maka berusahalah agar itu terjadi. Berpikirlah positif dan melangkahlah dengan menurut hati dan logika yang baik.  Karena langkahmulah yang akan menuntun alam semesta untuk menuntun orang tersebut menuju ke suatu titik yang sama denganmu yang disebut pertemuan.
Yang aku alami sendiri adalah murni kebetulan kosmos. Aku bahkan ga pernah membayangkan sebelumnya bahwa itu akan terjadi. Tapi saat konspirasi alam akhirnya terjadi, aku ga bisa menghindar dan pada akhirnya, pertemuan terjadi. Tidak begitu lama tapi rasanya aku tau bahwa aku bertemu orang yang tepat. Tepat dalam banyak hal. Dan yang lebih ‘kebetulan’-nya lagi semua itu terjadi di hari yang sama dengan rusaknya mood-ku. Jadi, cosmological coincidence ini seolah telah dirancang dengan sedemikian rupa untuk membalikkan mood-ku yang hancur menjadi, well, sempurna.
Senang? Who doesn’t?
In the end, this cosmological coincidence finally leads me to such a new section of my life. I thank God and the universe for making such a lovable thing like cosmological coincidence. Cause when I thought something never walking in my lifecycle, then it is.
Dan saat orang membaca postingan ini, jangan berpikir bahwa aku jatuh cinta.
Aku hanya masih bertemu dengan orang yang tepat.

June 19, 2011

Personal Writing: Silliness I’ll Miss That Much

11:51 pm
got a bad sore throat, can’t close my eyes, my bed doesn’t feel comfort as usually.
tryna to remember what happened today, nothing special but I enjoyed it anyway. had a post test today of manufacturing process laboratory at 2 pm. but i did come to campus at 8:30 pm. there was something that forced me to come at that time.
well, i thought i’ll b in a very boring time but I was totally wrong. I walked to the 2nd floor then met 3 of my pals. we’d some chit chat instead studying for the post test. we talked about us, about life, about well, everything. then suddenly i thought i’ll miss the hours like that someday. i’ll miss us, i’ll miss the stupid conversation, the bench where we’d sit and talked about our silliness, the laughs that seems like won’t stop. we’re the sophomore and we act like the elementary students. it’s so stupid and i’ll miss it so much.
after the graduation 2 years from now on (amen) i won’t stay in Medan anymore. gotta back to my hometown. gotta back to the city where I used to be.
sometimes i think, i did meet so many people in my life and i’ll always do. friend, best friend they came everywhere I ever stayed. but as time goes by, one by one they slowly began to disappear from view but remain in my heart. i’m not in a middle of sayin such a cliche thing but it’s so true. i never really forget all friends that ever be by my side. i’m not that kinda person.
well, its a quarter after midnight, I guess i’ll go to sleep
tryna to think about life that I live here, I hope i’ll dream about tomorrow, when everything seemed so comfort and warm inside-outside. i guess it always be.

June 12, 2011

Favorites: Waiting For Forever

'Some day you will find me
I haven't gone too far
I miss the way we were back then
How we laughed
I can feel you in my heart
There's a world in your eyes
I can see it getting brighter
All the hours that we turned into days
We were young seemed like life would go on last forever
All I had was you by my side
Some day you will answer
Remember how we were
When all our hopes and dreams
Floated in the air I feel it in my heart
I can feel you in my heart
That's the way that it was in the past you remember
When we ran through the wind and the rain
We were young seemed like life would go on last forever
Now everything has changed'

Worlds Apart by The Mostar Diving Club

Damn, I cried during the movie played.

Personal Writing: Beginning-Ending Theory

Today, something figured out.
Well, actually I knew that. I even experienced it by myself. Its been a long long time but I still remember how it goes.
The beginning-ending thingy is the point. Sometimes you hear some say perfect beginning gonna lead to perfect ending. It's not true, sometimes. But most of all, it is not. Sometimes, you see the very perfect beginning of something in your life and you do really believe its gonna be long last and will b alright whatever it takes. Like in a relationship. But in the middle of that something you'll gradually see that its not as easy as you ever thought. 

This afternoon, once again, it revealed. Two humans were in love, deeply in love. Thought it won’t end. But it is. When one of ‘em finally found that the other one never really be deeply in love with their self. One will say, “suck, you lied to me!” when the other one say, “suck, you caught me”.
Were gonna have a feeling like,”I am so stupid. I should've known that somebody’s lying to me. It was so clear, I’m just too blind to see it cause that somebody was shining so bright right into my eyes. I’m deeply in love with that one but why it should end up like this?”
Instead, its a good way. I mean, the break means the ending is not perfect. But you’ll see, its good for you. Good for your heart, good for the future you gonna live in.
Today, something figured out: you better have a lame beginning with perfect ending than perfect beginning with lame ending. Trust me.

June 8, 2011

Random: Here You Are, Mr Cold :)

Its already 0:38 am here.
I got a bunch of exercises to do but it’s not the right time. I feel, err, lost?
No, sometimes I feel like theres a big hole in my heart, doesnt mean my heart got porous. But it feels like I’m losing something but I’m not exactly losing something, physically. Final test day 2 will b held tomorrow but I have no interest to open the books and read something about that major.
So, I turn my laptop on, and browse my blog. God, it’s like cosmological coincidence! Here he is. It’s been 2 months, I’d never be here in the same time with him. But I am now. I’m so glad, I even can’t describe how it feels inside. It’s like the big hole meets the fillings. He’s like, coming and complete me tonight. I am so happy having this little time to spend with you. I know youre so far far away, its miles away so far from the place where I stay right now, but you know what, I can feel you. You are there, doing your work and all that great things or mayb watching movies, idk, but youre ‘on’.
Well, now it’s time to confess something to you.
I deeply missing you. Madly wishing you always b here. I know it’s stupid but it’s normal cause I’m falling for you. Idc if you dont know what I feel inside cause idec if you are. Cause the point is, I’m in love with you and it’s enough. I dont want you to stay by my side. I just want to see you around, even if thru the screen but it’s okay for me. Well, thankyou for coming to my screen tonight. You are loved, you know. You dont have to feel like youre alone there.
I desperately miss you.
It’s already 0:59 am. Cant believe it took 20 minutes to write this down. What a shame. Well, see you thru the screen, I have to sleep, and you, have a nice lunch! :)

June 7, 2011